November 20, 2014


Ask Nikki 11.20

Today’s advice question comes from L.G., who writes:

I need advice ASAP! I try to talk to my crush, but I feel very awkward around him, so I run away and stare at him so nobody can see me. How can I be brave enough to talk to him?

My Advice:

Hi there, L.G.! I TOTALLY get where you’re coming from with this.

When I first started talking to Brandon, I blushed and stared at the ground so much that he probably thought I had some weird skin disease…and an even weirder obsession with my feet!

I was always super nervous to talk to him because I thought I’d say something dumb, like, “Want to walk with me to the library? I really want to check you out! I mean a book! I want to check a BOOK out!”

And I was afraid I might do something totally embarrassing, like get so caught up talking to him between classes that I’d follow him into English class and take the seat next to him…in HIS English class, not mine!

But after a while, I got a lot better at not being a total spaz, and there were a few things that really helped.

First, take deep breaths! A few times I started breathing really fast and heavy before talking to Brandon because I was so nervous. But then I sounded like I just ran laps in gym class when I panted, “How…was…your…night?” Not cute!

If you take a few deep breaths before you talk to your crush, you’ll feel much more chill!

Secondly, ask questions about him, stuff he can’t answer with “yes” or “no.” EVERYONE likes talking about themselves, so I guarantee if you act interested in him, he’ll think, “Wow, she’s so fun to talk to!”

But don’t ask things like, “Do you like pickles?” or “Do you take the bus?” It has to be something he needs to answer with AT LEAST a sentence! This way, you get to know him a little better, which makes it easier to start conversations with him in the future.

You could ask about what kinds of movies or music he likes, what sports he plays, or what subjects he enjoys. And then, if he likes the same stuff you do, you’ll have a chance to tell him a little about you.

Lastly, think about something that makes you feel totally confident about yourself before you approach him.

When you’re not feeling confident, it shows! And I’m not just talking about tomato head syndrome. (That’s when your face is SO red that it looks like a big tomato with hair!)

When you don’t feel confident, you might slump your shoulders, fidget, look down at your feet, say “um” a lot, and try to get away from him ASAP. (Like, “Um, hi, um, well, um, bye!”)

But if you think about something you’re really good at before you start talking, you’ll remember that you’re just as awesome as he is…and he’s lucky YOU want to talk to HIM!

What do you guys think? Do you have any advice for L.G.?