December 17, 2016



Dear Brandon,

I have a major problem. How do I stay calm if my boy classmates are rowdy (no offense)? They keep on shouting, running around the classroom, playing with paper balls, and finally, loudly chewing their food, which is DISGUSTING!!! Whatever I say or do, they keep finding ways to give me a headache. One of them got on my nerves so much that I gave up and completely lost it!! PLEASE HELP!!!!!!

Bothered By Bratty Boys


Well first of all, no offense taken. :-) I’m guessing you don’t mean that ALL boys aggravate you like this. It’s probably a certain group, right?

I’m also guessing there might sometimes be girls you find annoying. Maybe the girls don’t misbehave as much in your classroom. But, are there some girls who are a total pain during lunch, in the hallway, or when you’re just hanging out?

You sound like you might be an introvert—the kind of person who needs quiet time alone to recharge. (Extroverts are people who need active time with other people to recharge. They actually get drained by being quiet and alone!)

For whatever reason, in middle school it can feel like a LOT more people are extroverts. And school is sort of set up to be a challenge for introverts. You have to be in a room full of people pretty much all day long. The bathroom’s kind of the only place you can go to be alone, and people even hang out in there.

So yeah, I get it.

I think there are a few things you can do to try to be less stressed out by the annoying boys (and girls) at school:

  1. Talk to your teacher. This will depend on your teacher, but there’s a chance your teacher will understand, if you tell them how annoyed you get. You might be able to work out a signal that tells your teacher you need to step out into the hallway for a minute of peace. Maybe your teacher could let you go work in the library sometimes, or could send you to the office when they need a message delivered. If your teacher knows you need breaks from the crazy in order to function better in the classroom, they will probably try to help you.
  2. Spend lunch in the library. Obviously, you have to eat your food first. But once that’s done, a librarian is exactly the kind of person who might understand if you tell them you need a quiet place to be alone for some time during the school day.
  3. Keep your non-school hours chill. Avoid overscheduling after-school/weekend activities so you can fill your schedule with lots of quiet time. This will help you have the energy to return to school.

I hope this is helpful. Sometimes it just helps to know you’re not alone. And you’re definitely not. There are lots of people who get annoyed by rowdy kids at school. I’m sure they’ll chime in down below.

If you’re a person who likes calm and quiet, how do you get through the school day? What are your tips for being around rowdy people?