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September 11, 2017

DAISY’S SKUNK FUNK DISASTER

dork-diaries-sept11th-dogMy parents were going out for their anniversary, and my big present to them was babysitting Brianna. They left at 6:30, and I made mac & cheese, because I am an EXCELLENT big sister. (Also: I love mac & cheese!)

The only downside to mac and cheese is the icky sticky pan. Getting that gunk off is like trying to get all the layers of MacKenzie’s makeup off her face! So I was standing at the sink, scrubbing at the pan, when Daisy started to freak out at the back door.

“Brianna,” I called, “let Daisy out!”

“I’m busy!” she called back.

I looked away from the pan to see her sitting on the couch, looking at a Princess Sugar Plum book. “Let Daisy out or come clean this pan!”

(And WOW, did I sound like my mom when I said that. It was a little weird. Also a little awesome!)

Brianna stomped over to the door and let Daisy out into the back yard.

A few minutes later, Daisy barked to be let in. I had JUST finished the Mac and cheese pan, so I went to let her in.

As soon as she walked in, the MOST HORRIBLE smell came in with her.

Like, I don’t have WORDS to describe the STENCH!!
Just then, Brianna came back in the room.

“PEEEEE-YOOOOOOO!!!” she screeched. “Nikki! What did you DO?!?!?!”

“I didn’t— Daisy just— OMG!!”

I raced to the kitchen to try to get away from the smell, but it followed me! Like it was burned into my nostrils!

But then I saw that Daisy had followed me. And that’s when I realized…there was NOTHING else this smell could be…

Daisy had been sprayed by a SKUNK!!!

“Put her back outside!” Brianna shouted.

I agreed with Brianna! But Daisy didn’t. She was running around the table like a maniac. I went and held the back door open.

Then Brianna said, “What if the skunk comes IN?!?!”

I slammed the door shut.

“Okay, okay. I just need to think!”

This seemed like something my PARENTS should have to deal with! But they weren’t here. Daisy didn’t want to go outside (and who could blame her???). I thought about taking Brianna outside to get away from the smell, but what if the skunk sprayed us?!?!?

It was HARD to think with the skunk fumes taking over my BRAIN. Brianna looked like she might pass out.

“Come here.” I held out my hand and led Brianna to our parents’ bedroom. We shut Daisy out and huddled in the farthest corner of the room. I started searching the internet. I mean, the internet has instructions for EVERYTHING, right?!?!

The internet said if your dog gets sprayed by a skunk, you have to act IMMEDIATELY. The longer you wait, the more it sets in, and the dog can smell like skunk for A YEAR!

So that ruled out waiting for my parents to come home!!

I scrolled a little more, then put down my phone. “Okay,” I said. “Tomato juice!”

Brianna snapped her fingers in my face, like she was trying to wake me up. “It’s not snack time, Nikki!”

“No, it says here we’re supposed to give her a bath in tomato juice!”

And we were SO lucky that Mom had just bought a whole case at the warehouse store for some juice cleanse thing she keeps planning to do but never does.

Now that we had a plan, it felt like we were on a mission. We could handle this! Sister power!! And when my parents got home, they’d see how responsible we’d been. I went to the garage for the case of tomato juice, and Brianna got Daisy into the bathroom.
I don’t even know HOW she did it, but when I got there with the juice, there they were! I shut the door behind me so Daisy couldn’t escape, but almost immediately I thought my nose was going to burn right off my face. Brianna looked like she was going to puke!

“Quick, open these!” I shoved the case of tomato juice at her. It was a bunch of tiny pop-top cans. She got to work opening them while I cranked the bathroom window open. It didn’t really help. Brianna and I were in mission-mode, though. It felt like we should have been wearing one of those head-to-foot HAZMAT uniforms with a gas mask when you’re handling toxic waste!
SO GROSS!! 🙁

I wasn’t sure where to start, but Brianna grabbed a can in each hand and started pouring. So, I did too. Daisy didn’t know what hit her!

If you ever have to wash a dog with tomato juice, let me warn you: In addition to the SMELL, it looks like a horror movie!! All that red juice everywhere!!!

When we’d emptied our cans, we both reached for two more. But while we were opening more cans, Daisy jumped out of the bathtub! And THEN she did her all-over body shake thing she does when she’s wet. Only this time, IT WASN’T WATER!!

Tomato juice (with bonus skunk flavor!!) sprayed ALL OVER THE BATHROOM!!!! And US!!! Now it REALLY, REALLY looked like a horror movie!!! And WE were the victims!!! 🙁 🙁

Brianna ran screaming from the bathroom, and Daisy took off after her. Now the whole HOUSE was going to be covered in skunk-flavored tomato juice!

I was the big sister. The babysitter. I could handle this. I HAD to. I caught up with Daisy, grabbed her, and locked her outside. It didn’t matter if she got sprayed again—it couldn’t get any worse!

Then, I did what I should have done in the beginning. I texted Brandon!
Because Brandon knows all about dogs!!

And OMG, he was sooooo sweet! He even offered to come over and help!! But OMG, NO WAY. I was covered in skunky tomato juice. If he saw me like that, he would NEVER be able to look at me again without thinking of the STENCH.

But I let him call me and put him on speakerphone while I followed his instructions. (FYI: hydrogen peroxide, baking soda, and liquid soap are the magic formula! And this concoction was ten times better than messy tomato juice!) It was NOT fun, but Brandon made me laugh while I washed Daisy up.

When I was finally done, I promised to text Brandon the next day and tell him how it all turned out. I went to check on Brianna, and she had collapsed into bed. I did the same.

But OMG, you should have heard my mom scream when they came home later!!

I guess I maybe should have given my parents a heads-up about the tomato juice all over the house. It was a MESS, but Brianna and I survived it!

What harrowing situation or emergency have you ever dealt with? Tell us all about it in the comments!